God Saved My Marriage

Hello Everyone. Please take a look at this video from my YouTube Channel. It is a little insight into my new book
An Attitude of Love: The Ways of A Godly Wife.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6OdrmxEYfmY

Holy Boldness

This morning I was reading a part of Acts 4 and I could NOT get past the part where the Scriptures talk about the boldness of Peter and John when it came preaching the name of JESUS. Check this out (I will highlight the parts that I find interesting):
Boldness

Acts 4 New King James Version (NKJV)

Peter and John Arrested

Now as they spoke to the people, the priests, the captain of the temple, and the Sadducees came upon them, being greatly disturbed that they taught the people and preached in Jesus the resurrection from the dead. And they laid hands on them, and put them in custody until the next day, for it was already evening. However, many of those who heard the word believed; and the number of the men came to be about five thousand.

Addressing the Sanhedrin

And it came to pass, on the next day, that their rulers, elders, and scribes,as well as Annas the high priest, Caiaphas, John, and Alexander, and as many as were of the family of the high priest, were gathered together at Jerusalem.And when they had set them in the midst, they asked, “By what power or by what name have you done this?”

Then Peter, filled with the Holy Spirit, said to them, “Rulers of the people and elders of Israel: If we this day are judged for a good deed done to a helpless man, by what means he has been made well, 10 let it be known to you all, and to all the people of Israel, that by the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, whom you crucified, whom God raised from the dead, by Him this man stands here before you whole. 11 This is the ‘stone which was rejected by you builders, which has become the chief cornerstone.’[a] 12 Nor is there salvation in any other, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.”

The Name of Jesus

Ok. I have officially gotten excited! They had HOLY (Ghost) boldness!!! The “HIGH PRIESTS, the CAPTAIN OF THE TEMPLE and the SADDUCEES  were “religious” but they did NOT know the POWER OF THE NAME OF JESUS!!! Well, I wonder about that because, my question would be, If they didn’t know about the name of Jesus, why were they fighting SO HARD to keep them from teaching/preaching about or in the name of JESUS? Hmmm

The Name of Jesus Forbidden

13 Now when they saw the BOLDNESS of Peter and John, and perceived that they were uneducated and untrained men, they marveled. And they realized that they had been with Jesus. 14 And seeing the man who had been healed standing with them, they could say nothing against it. 15 But when they had commanded them to go aside out of the council, they conferred among themselves,16 saying, “What shall we do to these men? For, indeed, that a notable miracle has been done through them is evident to all who dwell in Jerusalem, and we cannot deny it. 17 But so that it spreads no further among the people, let us severely threaten them, that from now on they speak to no man in this name.

18 So they called them and commanded them not to speak at all nor teach in the name of Jesus. 19 But Peter and John answered and said to them, “Whether it is right in the sight of God to listen to you more than to God, you judge.20 For we cannot but speak the things which we have seen and heard.” 21 So when they had further threatened them, they let them go, finding no way of punishing them, because of the people, since they all glorified God for what had been done. 22 For the man was over forty years old on whom this miracle of healing had been performed.

Okay, okay, okay!

First they religious leaders thought Peter and John were uneducated/untrained (ignorant) men but they REALIZED they (Peter and John) had been with JESUS. See, spending time with JESUS  does something to you! GLORY! The religious leaders knew that they couldn’t do anything to Peter and John because there were many who witnessed the man’s healing and many believed so the religious leaders threatened them and told them not to speak the name of JESUS. .

That is TEAM TOO MUCH.

Prayer For Boldness

23 And being let go, they went to their own companions and reported all that the chief priests and elders had said to them. 24 So when they heard that, they raised their voice to God with one accord and said: “Lord, You are God, who made heaven and earth and the sea, and all that is in them, 25 who by the mouth of Your servant David[b] have said:

‘Why did the nations rage,
And the people plot vain things?
26 The kings of the earth took their stand,
And the rulers were gathered together                      
Against the Lord and against His Christ.’[c]

27 For truly against Your holy Servant Jesus, whom You anointed, both Herod and Pontius Pilate, with the Gentiles and the people of Israel, were gathered together 28 to do whatever Your hand and Your purpose determined before to be done. 29 Now, Lord, look on their threats, and grant to Your servants that with all BOLDNESS they may speak Your word, 30 by stretching out Your hand to heal, and that signs and wonders may be done through the name of Your holy Servant Jesus

31 And when they had prayed, the place where they were assembled together was shaken; and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit, and they spoke the word of God with BOLDNESS.

God, the all-knowing God, KNEW that Peter and John would be in the position they were in. They NEVER asked God to “get them, God, because they threatened us” nor did they say, “God, You said, Touch not mine anointed and do my prophets no harm, but these religious leaders put us in jail, now send Your angels to destroy them”.

No, sometimes we think that we are not supposed to go through anything, but verse 28 lets me know that what all of the religious leaders did was DETERMINED before to be done. It was in God’s plan. So, wisdom led Peter to pray vs. 30. They prayed for God to stretch out HIS hand so that signs and wonders could be done through the name of JESUS. And of course, they asked for MORE BOLDNESS.

I absolutely love this passage of Scripture. God knew they would be persecuted for using the name of Jesus, but they taught and preached with BOLDNESS…….the name of JESUS and many believed.

In this day and time, there are many whom would like for the Christian to just shut up and stop talking about the name of Jesus. Granted, there are many people who have brought shame to the name of Jesus by doing things, openly, which are contrary to the teachings of Jesus. However, those of us who stand in holiness (none of us are perfect but we strive), must STAND IN BOLDNESS and preach and teach JESUS. Of course the “world” does not want anybody to preach/teach JESUS because there is POWER in that name.

The “world” can cuss on television, radio, videos, etc, but when Christians want to teach/preach the name of Jesus, the “world” wants us to shut up! Wrong Answer.

So, I am encouraged to go forth in BOLDNESS and preach/teach the name of JESUS. How about you?

Let It Go!

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Does this look familiar? Husband and wife going at each other’s neck. I don’t know what the couple in the picture is “arguing” about, but I’d like to stand there and just say “LET IT GO!!!”

I used to be an argumentative, contentious woman. Everything got on my nerves. Everything was a reason for ME to argue or find fault. I WAS MISERABLE and I made my husband miserable. Why? Because I had some things from my past that I did not let go of and I brought that baggage into my marriage.

I didn’t realize how damaged I was and how much unforgiveness I was holding on to. Arguing had become a sport for me. I didn’t feel right unless I was arguing. It gave me some sort of pseudo power. I felt like in was in control when I argued with my husband because he is not an arguer. He is a peaceful man. And yes, he had been through some difficult things in his life, but he had let it go! He chose not to carry the hurt of his youth in to his present/future.

I remember when one of my husband’s uncle’s passed away. My husband eulogized him and during the sermon, one thing that stuck out from the entire sermon was this; “Let it Go!!!” This was before Disney came out with the movie, Frozen. In fact, that was back in 2001.

He told the listening audience to let go of anger that you’ve been holding on to for years and years. He said, “some of you are angry with people and don’t even remember why. Let it go!!!” People began to start crying and said they wanted to let it go. Some of the people at the funeral were arch enemies because they were the girlfriends of my husbands deceased uncle. They were wondering which one of them were going to get his money, but he had a wife whom he was still legally married to (yes the other women knew it). So, in the end, they had to LET IT GO because now, sugar daddy was dead and the money train was gone. It wasn’t the fault of the other mistress so they had to let it go.

Then he talked about his own life….how he had to forgive his dad for not being there for him and his brother. He said, publicly, “I felt bad when you left us, dad, but today, I LET IT GO!” He said, “Dad, I love you and whatever happened in our past, I let it go!!!” His father never forgot that. Every time they got together, his dad always brought it up and thanked him for saying “Let It Go”. They had a better relationship during his dad’s later years than they ever had. I was proud of my husband and so were many others.

However, when it came my time to let it go, I had a hard time with it. I couldn’t let go of the feelings I had towards the man who violently raped me. I couldn’t let go of the fact that the right to raise my children was taken away from me due to revenge. I couldn’t let go of the feelings I had of being rejected by several men. I couldn’t let go of the fact that I felt like the world hated me. No. I couldn’t let go. If I let go, I would be losing another part of me. The only part I had control of.

Fast forward to 2010, I was faced with a situation that was heart-wrenching. I needed to take a trip but God would not let me go until I released some of the emotional baggage that I was still holding on to. Number 1 bag that had to go was HATE/anger. How could I help someone else with all of that hate inside of me? So, as God does it, HE had me to confess my hurt/HATE/anger and begin to deal with it. I wrestled with God for a moment and then, finally, I LET IT GO! I LET GO OF THE HATE/ANGER/HURT. Yes, I was finally free of that part of my life, and it felt good. I could face whom/what I needed to face without being bitter, hateful, resentful, etc. I HAD, FOR THE FIRST TIME, LET IT GO! And guess who it helped? ME.

So, let it go. Whatever it is, Let it Go. If you feel as if you can’t, ask God to help you. I know for a fact that HE will help you if you want HIM to. It may hurt to release all of the baggage, but you deserve to be free from the mental anguish. You deserve to be free from any and all guilt you may be feeling. You deserve to be FREE.

I am so glad that I am no longer argumentative towards my husband. Of course, he is ecstatic about it. He has a new wife and that new wife is me. Why? Because I let it go………….

Condemnation or Love -

I have been thinking lately about how certain people have been treated mistreated by the “church”. There is one group in particular, the gay community, who have been targeted and demeaned by those who proclaim to know and Love God. I have a confession: I was one of those people who condemned the gay community as those going to hell because their lifestyle is contrary to what the Bible teaches. However, recently, God has been giving me more of HIS HEART towards ALL MANKIND and that is HIS HEART OF LOVE.

I began thinking, “How can I minister to the gay community, the love of God?” or How can I minister to the woman or man who sells their body for sex or drugs?” “How will I minister to the alcoholic who curses God every chance he or she gets?” How Lord can I show these people YOUR LOVE?

My heart has taken a turn to LOVE and away from CONDEMNATION. I looked into the eyes of a homosexual man, on Thursday, and at first, I was put off by his obvious female gestures, talk and posture, but then I heard him say something that forever changed my perspective about the gay community…..”We hurt just like anybody else”. Now, I know everybody has a point in their life where they hurt, emotionally, but is it the job of the Christian to add more hurt to the hurting?

While I am totally opposed to same sex relationships, how can I win any to God or even show God’s love to them if I am approaching them in condemnation? I know how it feels for someone to tell me that I am going to hell because of my rebellious, disobedient behavior. That was not something I would think a loving God would say to me. It made me feel like I didn’t want to know God and I know that is the way a lot of people who engage in the same sex lifestyle feel. I don’t want to add to that any longer. I want to show love to EVERYBODY just as God showed HIS love to ME when I walked contrary to HIS word and HIS way. God has never condemned me but His Holy Spirit convicted me of my sin. The Holy Spirit showed me where I erred and lovingly prompted me to learn the ways of God and to walk in them without trying to figure out in my natural mind….the mind of Christ.

See, our natural minds are finite. We, in our natural/human state cannot fully understand the things and ways of God, but what we DO know is what we should demonstrate to those who are hurting for whatever reason.

God did not call us to be Christian Bullies. He did not call us to Kill the soul of another person, but HE DID call us to LOVE one another. I wholeheartedly do not agree with the idea of same-sex relationships/marriages and I don’t think I ever will, but I am determined to walk in love towards those who either don’t know the Bible truth, rebel against Bible truth, are confused by Bible Truth, or just don’t even care about Bible Truth. I will, lovingly point out scriptures which reference same sex activities, but I will not beat anybody upon the head with the Bible trying to force them to believe what I believe. I don’t do that to alcoholics, fornicators, liars, thieves, adulterers, murderers, those who sow discord, etc., so I won’t do it to one particular group.

Everybody has a soul where their emotions dwell. I don’t want to be a agent of hate towards any human being for we all have fallen short of the Glory of God. Not one of us have walked 100 before the God we SAY we serve.

Yes, I will continue to preach the Word of God, but I will not condemn.
Yes, I will continue to teach the Word of God, but I will not condemn.
I will show love……….to ……..every……human being just as God has shown love to me.

The Missing Link

There have been many times I have wondered “Why did God put me on this earth? What is my purpose?” I’ve wondered that without getting an answer that I am totally satisfied with. I’ve been told that I am here to help other women to know that they can overcome adversity. I’ve been told that I was put here to birth my three children (even though I was not allowed to be in their lives due to circumstances I could not control). I’ve been told that I am here to be an evangelist (which I am), a prophetess (which many say I am), an author (which I am), and an advocate for women. Some things which have been spoken over me have come to pass, however, I still feel something is lacking. There is a missing link but I don’t         know what it is or who it is.

Chain with missing link

I’ve started on a new journey in my life. At first, I was excited and ready to get started. Things quickly began happening and I was completely blown away by the tremendous feedback, support and “genuine” happiness I felt from others. And then, three weeks in, I feel like a failure. Those who seemed to have had my back, have turned their backs on me. I was getting quick responses from people, now my email lays dormant. My helper has even fallen away and is not motivated. God, is this REALLY what I’m supposed to be doing? Is this my purpose in life or have I missed the mark?”

I am a very talented person who can write, edit, create gift items, do women’s group workshops, but then there is always something blocking what I know God has laid out for me to do. There is always some opposition to EVERYTHING I do. God, What is the missing link? Am I on the right path? What I am doing is good, but is IT the GOOD You want me to do? Why is every way that I turn, blocked, while others prosper? Am I out of Your will? Am I doing what You called me to do?

I do understand that everything worth doing is going to take much effort and most of the time, I will find myself doing what needs to be done, by my self. It can be daunting sometime, heck, it can even be discouraging but I am determined to see this thing through because I do believe that God has put me on this earth to help others come to HIM. I may not be the preacher who can draw in millions of people and money, but I believe God has set up those whom HE has chosen for me to minister to, so when my soul gets into the “God, did You REALLY lead me or tell me to do this?” mode, I reflect back on how many souls HE has allowed us to minister to already. No, not behind the traditional pulpit in the traditional church, but through social media outlets, internet radio, blogging, and writing books.

I am reminded that God’s ways or not my ways, Neither are His thoughts my thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9. I am reminded that God’s timing is perfect and that He knows the exact time that He wants His plan for my life executed. 

So, while I may not know the in-depth reason as to why God allowed me to come to this earth, What I do know, I will do in excellence so that my Heavenly Father will be pleased. I don’t want to do a partial job, nor an incomplete job. I want to do my assignment with joy, peace and love – for God and for His people.

With that being said, I march onward today to be a blessing to those whom God has assigned me to. Whether it is a smile, a “hello”, helping someone carry a bag, a phone call just to see how “they” are doing…etc. I will do what God has put me on this earth to do until I know the rest of the story.

Recycling Garbage!

I just watched a wonderful video by a young man named Prince Ea on Facebook. He made some excellent points about allowing garbage in your life. His video got me to thinking about the garbage I have allowed into my life over the years and how it (the garbage) has affected me.

As many of you know, I grew up in foster care. I suffered much abuse from the ages of 12-16. Yeah, that’s only four years, but those were some hellish years, wrought with physical, sexual and mental abuse. I learned how to be a physically and verbally abusive wife and mother during those years, by watching one of my foster mothers treat her husband and us foster children like we were somehow not deserving of love. I learned how to talk mean to, and about people whether or not they did anything to me that would justify my actions. I further learned how to be “good” or on my best behavior around certain people (putting on facade’s). I learned how to be demanding, abrupt, and just plain old callous. Relationships had an expiration date and the date was determined by me. I learned to cuss at people and physically fight, just for the heck of it (I didn’t really fight that much, but when I did, I picked on or bullied someone whom I knew was not going to challenge me until one day, I became the one being bullied). Yes, I had a lot of other garbage deposited in me and one of the major things was rejection. I rejected love because I didn’t really know what it was. I rejected people because I thought everybody was out to get me. How wrong I was.

During the last 3-4 years, God has systematically been healing me from my past hurts – in other words, He has been taking out the garbage. He has been changing my old mindsets and replacing them with HIS mindset as I pray and study His Word. Let me say this: God has tried to take the garbage out before, but I kept on recycling it. I didn’t know how to be Theresa without holding on to the garbage. I was actually afraid of becoming somebody else if I allowed God to heal me and that was a trick of the enemy of my soul. Satan wanted me to stay bound so that I couldn’t become who God intended me to be. He wanted me to stay stuck in misery, self-hate, self-loathing – filled with suicidal thoughts and self-damaging choices. But God had another plan for my life and that was for me to be healed and to walk in the newness of life.

Are you holding on to garbage that needs to be put out? Have you attempted to take the garbage to the curb, but before the garbage man could come to collect it, you went back out to the curb and re-collected it?

I pray for you that you will allow God to heal you of all garbage that was deposited into you. I pray that you will determine in your mind that you will be FREE because JESUS came to set the captives free. I pray that you will let God heal you so that you can be a witness to someone else who is going through the same thing that you are going through right now.

Don’t recycle the garbage. Let the trash go and be healed, in Jesus’ name. Amen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Some points from the video:

Our input determines our output

GMO’S  greedy, miserable, obnoxious (stay away from these types of people)

Fix yourself and become an example

Keeping hanging out with losers you will pick up their qualities.

Figure out what you want out of life, because you are going to be with YOU for the rest of your life.

Is God’s Timing Perfect?

april-27_time

To GOD, yes, HIS timing is ALWAYS PERFECT for us because HE knows all things and HE knows what’s best for us.

However, I can honestly say that I have DOUBTED GOD’S TIMING!  I can honestly say that God’s timing has not always been in sync with MY timing, but it has ALWAYS BEEN the PERFECT TIMING.

Sometimes, it has seemed that God has waited until the 11th hour and the 58th or 59th minute to come through. During those times, I have found myself anxious, fearful, and yes, angry at God because I felt like HE was either ignoring me or simply did not care. How human of me!!!

Then there were times when I prayed and trusted God for something to be done in His timing but because God’s timing, in my fallible opinion, was didn’t come quick enough, I went ahead of God and messed things up. Yes! I have gotten into relationships with the wrong people because I did not trust God’s PERFECT timing. I have spent money on things because I didn’t wait on God’s PERFECT timing.

Check this out….Psalm 24:17.

So, are you waiting for God to come through? Is HE taking longer than think HE should take? I just want to encourage you to TRUST IN GOD’S TIMING. HE is never late and HE is never premature. God’s timing is PERFECT and all we have to do is to trust HIM.

Have a super day!

Understanding Love – 1 Corinthians 13

                                                    “You didn’t clean up the kitchen!” “You always have MY living                                               room looking a mess!” “Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah!!!”                                                                           Notebook and pen

I read an article by Mustardseedbudget.wordpress.com entitled “Love Keeps No Record of Wrong” and I got to thinking of how I used to actually keep mental, and sometimes written records of what I thought my husband had done wrong to me. The things I kept record of were absolutely ridiculous and not really worth keeping record of. Things like, not putting his clothes in the hamper or leaving “my living room” out of order with his papers and books (he was a pastor and high school teacher so he had to have a place to study and check students’ work). He would cook dinner but I would be upset that he made a mess in the kitchen without cleaning it up. Let me tell you, I was a mess.

582263_524455310918929_661448233_n

Then one day, the Holy Spirit spoke to my spirit and said, “What if God kept a record of your wrongdoing and brought up your shortcomings? How would you feel?” That right there, stopped me in my tracks and made me think of how horrible I had been acting towards my husband about minor things. Things that could be easily corrected. Unfortunately, I reverted back to my old ways of keeping record of wrong until one day, my husband had had enough. He said, “Theresa, why is it that every time we have an argument, you bring up something I did wrong?” He went on to say, “I don’t do that to you and I have plenty of things I could say but I choose not to say them because they don’t really matter and I love you so I forgive you when you do something wrong. When are you going to let go and stop bringing up what I did? You say you forgive me, but you don’t because if you did, you wouldn’t keep bringing stuff up”. Well, I have to tell you, I felt like the worse person on earth. After all, my husband has never cheated on me, hit me, called me names, spent his/our money on illicit or unnecessary things, etc. I had/have the best husband I could ask for. He loves God (which I asked for). He is just a great man. But I was messed up inside. I was lashing out at him because I still needed healing from things I had suffered as a child and even in my adult life.

When my husband expressed his feelings, I had to sit down and reflect on what he said. I was not operating in love ~ agape. I was operating in selfishness. I wanted EVERYTHING to be MY WAY or NO WAY. It was my way to have control because growing up in foster care, I didn’t have control over the abuse I received. I didn’t have any control over how I was treated and I was determined that I was going to control what happened in my life from the time I left foster care until I closed my eyes in death. I didn’t know that I was messed up and was destroying my marital relationship.

Fast forward.

God has done some wonderful things in my life. I am still healing from some past hurts, but I no longer reflect my pain onto my husband. Whenever I feel something, I pray about it and allow God to heal that. I don’t waste paper and energy to write down what I consider wrong because God does not do that to me. If HE did, there would be enough books to fill several nice-sized libraries. I don’t allow the negative, condemning thoughts to take up space in my mind anymore.

Walking in God’s love is a choice. We have free will. I choose to do 1 Corinthians 13 and it has saved me and my marriage. My husband can truly say that he likes the woman I have become. Of course he has always loved me, but he didn’t like me very much. How could he. I was not likable. Truthfully, I didn’t like myself but I thank God for Change.

Thank you Mustard Seed Budget for your article. It is needed.

An Attitude Of Love: The Ways of A Godly Wife The video

Hey everybody,

Please view my new video on YouTube. It is about my new book, An Attitude of Love: The Ways of A Godly Wife.

Thank you for your support.

(Please click thumbs up and leave a comment so that I can know that you were there.

God bless you.

The video for my book – An Attitude of Love: The Ways of A Godly Wife

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